So, uhh… don’t suppose we have any pro riggers in here?
So here’s my base mesh:

Just tried using a basic meta-rig and applied it to the suit guy with automatic weights and I get… this:

So is this related to the automatic weights? Am I gonna have to paint it? UGH.
UPDATE: Also applying modifiers seems to completely break the automatic weights and weight paint as well so I guess I’m going to have to keep them?